Thanks. I will never make this mistake again.

I understand exactly where you’re coming from - a lot of us ’strong’ women talk a big game about knowing our worth, getting fancy degrees, working at fancy jobs, etc etc, but when confronted about our own actions to advocate for ourselves when it really counts, we sheepishly say “No, I didn’t know you could do that.”

When we’re talking white-collar jobs (ie, those kind of jobs that have the potential to confer significant decision-making power within an organization), negotiating salary, title, or responsibilities is uncomfortable idea for many otherwise ‘liberated’ /strong women. Yet, it’s all the more important. Over the course of an entire career, it can add up to millions of dollars that could go towards providing for a retirement, or leaving a legacy for your family.

Thanks for reading!

Susan

I found you through the videos you did with Ramit Sethi, and I’ve enjoyed reading the material you have here.

I consider myself a well-educated and ambitious young woman, and I definitely go to battle for colleagues, companies, friends, groups, and more. But it’s taking me a little more time and courage to realize that I can do the same for myself. Over the past few years, I’ve been exercising my take-care-of-me muscles in a number of ways, but it hadn’t occurred to me to negotiate salaries. I feel silly to admit that, had you asked me if I had negotiated my salary, I would’ve responded, “No, I didn’t know I could do that.”

I know I’d heard of the concept and that it always made sense, but I never really thought it would apply to my specific situations. Besides, wouldn’t it just make me seem demanding and like I was more trouble than I was worth?

Hoo-boy!

Your videos with Ramit and this post have really helped me to recognize that I do have those skills (”Hey! I’ve been doing that kind of stuff for other people all this time!”) and that I sure as hell can use them for myself.

Thanks for the great information, and thanks for taking on this commenter.

Cheryl

There are a lot of factors contributing to the gap– not just more frequent negotiation by men, and usually not because of overt wage discrimination. In this day and age, very few employers are out there saying, “Sit back down little lady! I’m going to pay you less because you’re a silly woman.” Instead, it comes in the form of different policies and practices toward men and women regarding parental leave, flex scheduling, and assertiveness on the job - among MANY other things. This is a pretty good article on it: http://clinton4.nara.gov/WH/EOP/CEA/html/gendergap.html#tren

Susan

Is this gap caused by wage discrimination, higher male negotiation per capita… or both?